Now I freely admit to never having read the book, but for some reason the fact that this chapter exists sticks in my memory.
And it is, I believe, a universal truth.
When men are working through "Stuff" they get all quiet and insular and like bears, they hibernate until they're ready to come out.
Women?
We talk.
We head off with our nearest and dearest besties and talk. And rave. And plot. And scheme. And talk. And bitch.
Rinse.
Repeat.
And the girls would never dream of offering solutions. They just sit and listen, and refill your glass, and pass you the tissues and tell you "it's not because you're fat" and refill your glass and hold you while tears trickle down your face.
And if your friends are really all they are meant to be, all they should be after 30 or so years of supporting each other through marriages (good and bad), births (good and bad), cheap tawdry one-nighters (good and bad), they know what you'll need to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, hoik up your Big Girl's Boggers and SUCK IT UP, TIGER.
For some women it's chocolate. For some it's wine. For some it's a new man, for some it's a day spa.
For me, well, you can probably guess.
It's food.
Herbs still fresh and warm from Tee's garden. Her idea of being one of my oldest friends?
"I bought them so you could cook for us"
Oh Goddess, does that girl know me!!
Chicken in Pajamas at the Rosedale Pub, courtesy of Sue. Good, hearty country pub fare. No pretentious twattage, no bullshit. Just food and non-judgemental company.
Her idea of being one of my oldest friends?
"come to my house and just be."
It's not Chicken Soup that nurtures a Soul, it's chicken parma and a pot, and the deep, abiding laughter of someone you've known more than 30 years.
And then to come home to Widdie, who doesn't bother to bring anything but the main ingredient because "I know you'd have everything else I need", and smoked salmon roulades, to talk about being mad old cat ladies together.
Her idea of being one of my oldest friends?
Nodding in ALL the right places.
In 2010, make sure you forget the crap chain emails, and the bullshit forwarded Face Crack status update, and remeber to tell your 'festy besties" that Women Talk, and that is what nourishes our souls.