Tuesday 31 March 2009

Dobby, the House Elf

"This, sir?" said Dobby, plucking at the pillowcase. "'Tis a mark of the house-elf's enslavement, sir. Dobby can only be freed if his masters present him with clothes, sir. The family is careful not to pass Dobby even a sock, sir, for then he would be free to leave their house forever."

This morning, as I left The House of Fur and Purple Love, my husband, Furry, was doing the washing up.

In the nude.

For those of you who know him, you may well imagine this. For those of you that don't, imagine a portly, middle aged man, pretty much covered in body hair, standing at our sink, whistling tunelessly.

Now Furry often finds himself nude. He is well known for his streak at the Turrumburry Races, and even poor Auntie Linnie has had her eyes soiled, as she jogs past our house in the early morning, to see Furry standing in our picture window, rubbing his eyes and his "nethers" and farting, but to see him standing at the sink, nekkid bottie wobbling as he scrubbed last nights pots, gave me pause.

When I remarked upon his nude status he replied in best Lancashire accent "T' Missus, she's a dragon. Won't give me clothes to ware, keeps me chained at sink. Nary a stitch t'cover m'arse and work all day long scroobin' it is"

Please, dear reader, I beseech you. PLEASE FIND FURRY A JOB, HE'S DRIVING ME MAD!

In other news, with Furry's unemployment about to hit the 4month mark, and no prospects on the horizon, we're falling back on old frugal recipes to save some dosh. This weekend past, we made Mr Chang's Wombok salad.

Baby Bok Choy Crunchy Noodle Salad



1 bunch Baby Bok Choy
6 Green onions (spring onions) chopped 10mm lengths
100g packet Changs Crunchy Noodles (flat noodle)
100g chopped roasted cashew nuts


¼ cup white vinegar
2 tablesp soy sauce light
2 tsp Changs sesame oil
2 tsp Changs fish sauce
1/8 cup vegetable oil
1/3 cup castor sugar

Remove individual bok choy stalk with leaves and wash well. Shred diagonally in slices 5-8cm wide. Place bok choy in serving bowl, add chopped green onions, and toss. Just before serving, pour over dressing, add nuts and noodles, toss well to combine.

To make dressing, combine all ingredients in bowl and whisk.

From www.changs.com.au.

And I had a bit left over, undressed (much like Furry) and some extra noodles. I quickly stir fried the cabbage/pine nut/spring onions. Added some chicken thigh pieces fried off in sesame oil in another pan. Add the salad dressing and a heaped tablespoon of crunchy peanut butter. Cook over high heat until peanut butter has melted, serve immediately on rice, and top with crunchy noodles.

A most excellent way to use up leftovers that otherwise would have been tossed.


the girl with pointy sticks said...

Oh Purply One, I am hating that yall are so low on the job front. FunDaddio and I are in the exact same spot, with even the same four months of no employ. Clearly this is a sign we should all become fetish webcam owners.

purple goddess said...

Yeah, Momma, but does the Fun Daddio srub yer pots in the raw??

I think you should come to OZ, and Furry and the Fun Dad can start their own business

the girl with pointy sticks said...

Does it count if he scrubs my pots raw?
I heard a rumor from my sister that the agri business down there is looking for people. Is she off her rocker? If not, the off to come down is mighty tempting!

grocer said...

I live with the naked Barista,
am up to 2 years without gainful employment,
and happen to like Mr Chang's cabbage salad!

Griffin said...

By 'eck, trouble at mill! At least it'll be a clean mill. It's when he tries deep frying nude he'll have to worry.

Hot oil and nudity... harm can come to a young lad like that!

If he drives you mad, it'll save time.

Griffin said...

A thought... he could be a life model for the local college! They expect you to be nude, indeed it is considered bad form if you aren't.

Jazz said...

PG I wish I had a job for him, but if it's getting too much, he can come scrub my pots in the raw whenever he likes.

Becca said...

Hey at least he was doing the dishes. I guess I am an always look on the bright side kind of person!


Please visit me at http://www.askbecca.com

Bluenose said...

I do not, I repeat NOT, want Furry wondering around my kitchen in the nuddy, whether doing dishes, cooking, drinking beer, playing Uckers or, in fact, doing anything whatsoever.

The very idea has traumatised me for life and my psyche has been unutterable cauterized by the very idea of such a calamity.

PG youare a very naughty girl and you should go and get some one to give you a proper smacking. With leather-wear and stock whips.

CelticGirl said...

Shyte the bed, that was funny. I have a visual that will most certainly require therapy. Love to you and Furz.

Anonymous said...

apparently there is massive demand in the pest control biz up round Brissy ... was told that little gem at dinner last night. sorry it's not very helpful ... and for sure he wouldn't want to be spraying termites in te nuddeh.



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